Skip to main content

Madelyn Barrett

I really don't even know where to begin or how to write this post. I've put it off for several days hoping that maybe if I let things sink in a little more it would be easy. This will never be easy.

As you know, we welcomed three beautiful little girls into the world on Friday afternoon. We had hoped to continue to "buy time" and hold off on delivery for several more weeks. God has always had a plan much bigger than either Reid or I could ever imagine. I have to chose to believe, everyday, that somehow this all fits perfectly into that plan.

We knew from the time of her delivery that Madelyn was struggling the most. The circumstances surrounding her birth caused a lot of trauma to her tiny body. After a day of fighting for a positive outcome, the neonatologist came to visit with us and told us it was time to let her go.

Late Saturday night we went to the NICU to hold our precious baby for the first and last time. She was absolutely perfect and looked just like her daddy - right down to her little ears. We spent time talking to her, praying over her, and grieving that we had such a short time with her here on earth. At 12:20 am on Easter Sunday, our sweet Madelyn Barrett met Jesus.

Through the last three weeks I keep repeating the song lyrics:

You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to say
Lord, blessed be Your name

As long as I live I may never understand why we had to say goodbye to two babies. What I do know is that He sustains. He is still on the throne. And, He loves me more than I will ever have the ability to fathom.

Mary Grace and Olivia are stable and still fighting. Its so sweet to already see their differing personalities. We think that Mary Grace is more laid back, goes with the flow, and looks more like me. Olivia looks more like Reid, has dark hair, and already let's us know what she does and doesn't like. They both, however, are fighters. We are so proud to be their mom and dad.

We ask for continued prayers for Mary Grace and Olivia. Please pray the Lord's protection over their lives and that, with each day, they would grow and thrive.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Comments

  1. Prayers for your tiny babies. I have had you on my mind and in my heart and prayed often for you this last week. I can tell you are grieving and rejoicing at the same time. God bless you and your family and give you strength and the peace that passes understanding.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I don't know you and I am not even sure how I found your blog, but I have been praying for you and your precious baby girls as well as your mom. i can't imagine what you're going through but we have to trust that God is in control and will sustain you.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I'm so sorry. Sending all my prayers and thoughts for Mary Grace and Olivia's survival. Please keep us posted on them. there are many of us pulling for you.

    Mo

    ReplyDelete
  4. Mary Virginia---You are in my constant thoughts and prayers during this very difficult time. My prayer is that God will hold you both in the palm of His hands and those precious baby girls will get stronger every day.
    Know that there are so very many people lifting you up in prayer.

    Sarah Frost...Kate Walker's mother

    ReplyDelete
  5. I am so sorry for your losses. May you find peace.

    ReplyDelete
  6. My heart breaks for you while rejoicing for you and the two sweet miracles still here on earth. I check your blog daily for updates to see how they are doing. Just know that your family is constantly in our thoughts and prayers...I pray for the day that you get to take your sweet angels home!! Much love and hugs from a total stranger!! :)

    ReplyDelete
  7. Your faith is incredible! Your family is in our prayers constantly and so heavy on my heart. Please know whatever lies on the road ahead, your family is being lifted up! God gives us strength, comfort and peace beyond understanding and always goes ahead! So sorry for your losses.

    ReplyDelete
  8. So very sorry! Praying for you and Reid and your sweet girls!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Standing behind you and holding up your arms as you fight this battle. Many prayers and love to you all.

    ReplyDelete
  10. I am praying for you and your girls every day. Your faith will guide you through each day. My heart is breaking for you and I am so sorry for the loss of your precious little girls.

    ReplyDelete
  11. I have questioned all along all of this. Your faith is such a great example Mare. I love you so much! Praying for all of you.

    ReplyDelete
  12. You and your sweet family are on my heart all of the time and constantly in my prayers. I've asked friends to pray for you as well. I wish there was a way that those of us who are reading your story could take some of the burden from you for awhile, but your faith is amazing to watch and quite a testimony to others. I will continue to pray for your daughters and for you and Reid.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Mary Virginia, I'm so sorry for the loss of your precious baby girls. I am praying daily for God to shower Mary Grace, Olivia, you, and Reid with his grace and strength.

    Rebekah Johnson Bloyd

    ReplyDelete
  14. Continued prayers for your family. I admire your faith and ability to keep focused on our heavenly father during such a difficult time. Hugs and prayers, Mama.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Mare, I can't tell you how much I've been thinking of you and praying for you. This post was so beautifully written and, of course, made me cry. Your light for Christ is shining SO brightly in the midst of unfathomable circumstances. I am praying for Mary Grace and Olivia, and for you and Reid. May Jesus continue to give you peace that passes all understanding. Love you friend!! SO proud of the awesome mom that you are!!!!!

    ReplyDelete
  16. You are inspirational. My family has been lifting you all up in prayer, and I've asked others to pray for you as well. May God continue to be your source of strength as you allow His light to shine through you.

    ReplyDelete
  17. It's difficult to even find words that will express the joy and sadness of what I believe you must be going through. I can't imagine being in your position right now. May God hold you and keep you, and bless your little ones with health and continued growth. There are so many people praying for you. I hope that helps you to find comfort in this time of roller-coaster feelings. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Where there is heartbreak, God gives us strength. Your story reminds us to teach our own multiples just how blessed they are to be here. Thank you for inspiring us all.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Mare- My heart is heavy for you. I am so sorry you are dealing with so much loss right not. I'll be thinking about you & your sweet family!

    <3
    Brooke

    ReplyDelete
  20. Praying for you.

    ReplyDelete
  21. My heart aches for you & your family. No words. We are thinking of you & Reid & will keep your precious girls in our thoughts.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Sending you all our heartfelt thoughts and prayers as you walk through this journey. Your strength and faith are remarkable.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Past Posts

Mary Grace

At 2:00 am this morning, our sweet Mary Grace was welcomed to Heaven. We found out this afternoon that she had a large brain hemorrhage. Reid and I spent three precious hours holding our daughter tonight. The nurses wrapped a pink bow around her little head and we swaddled her in a soft pink elephant blanket. During those hours, we told Mary Grace how proud we were of her fight, how she fulfilled our dreams of one day having a daughter to call "Gracie," and we even took a little nap, snuggled together as a family. If we told her we loved her once, we told her a thousand times. We prayed over her and gave her back to the Lord. We miss her more than words can say. I feel like we were punched in the stomach today and left with the wind knocked out of our lungs. Its so hard to understand "why?" in all of this. Tonight when we left the hospital, Reid turned on this song by David Crowder Band and we listened to it on repeat the whole way home. Its the exact state of our...

One day at a time

For the first time in my life I feel like I'm truly living one day at a time. Reid and I had a pretty good day yesterday. We were able to sleep in which was wonderful. Reid made us lunch and we sat outside in the backyard. It was a beautiful day and being outside did a lot of good for my mental health. :) There were still a lot of hard moments as memories from the night before would come rushing back to mind. We miss our sweet babies so much. Olivia had a good day yesterday. It was uneventful (which is a very good thing in the NICU) and they were able to turn down some of her medicine. We call every morning to check on our sweet girl and her nurse was quick to tell us how feisty our daughter is. We picked up on that in her first day of life, but it was funny to hear that someone else had observed the same. We are so in love with our feisty little Olivia. After we left the hospital, Reid and I went on a dinner date. It was so good for us to get out and feel like we...

Family of Four

If all continues to go well we will be headed home from the hospital tomorrow. I got a little stir crazy this afternoon and walking the halls just wasn't going to cut it so I went down to the gift shop to browse a bit. It feels so good to actually feel good after surgery. I also feel pretty rested and I'm very ready to settle into our new normal at home. My dad and Ann have been taking care of Olivia and have been such a tremendous help to us. Reid's parents were in town until this afternoon and Olivia got to spend some time with them yesterday. She's been very well taken care of by all her grandparents and I'm pretty sure she hasn't thought twice about us. Out of sight, out of mind. She has had a cough for a few days so Reid took her to the doctor this morning. Sure enough the cough is just allergy related but sweet girl has her first ear infection. The good news is that she hasn't run a fever and was able to get antibiotics to treat it. For all the change ...

Surprise!

God has blessed our family with quite a surprise! Olivia is getting a little brother or sister in early December. We are thrilled! As of today I am nine weeks along. We went to the doctor several weeks ago and were able to see the tiny bundle and hear the heartbeat. Everything looks great and we are so thankful! I'll share more details in the next few weeks. :)