I kept telling myself, "If I can just make it through this year..." The first year of my mom being in a nursing home and of the disease taking more of her than we had anticipated would happen so quickly. Everytime things got harder to face, I became understandably weary. Weary emotionally, physically, relationally. At times nothing makes sense.
But then someone said it, so perfectly, in a note I received this week. She said, "I sense the deep loss you already feel and anticipate that physical absence will only deepen that hole." How true were her words. This entire year, for me and my family, has been about learning to process still seeing our Mom, but losing everything we know her to be. Weary, at times, but so Thankful for all we have learned - about our God and His Sovereign plan, about ourselves, about eachother. For that we are Thankful. And, we will wait and find Hope that someday we will know His plan in all of this.
A year ago yeasterday, as I mentioned last night, was when we had our family pictures made (they are scattered through many blog posts). Last night, after El's birthday dinner, we all went together to take Mom icecream and took some pictures together. It isn't often that we are ALL there together, so it was a special time for us - definitely reminding us we have much to be Thankful for!
I hope you all have a wonderful day with family and friends. Happy Thanksgiving from The Bain Gang (and two Grandles)! ;)
But then someone said it, so perfectly, in a note I received this week. She said, "I sense the deep loss you already feel and anticipate that physical absence will only deepen that hole." How true were her words. This entire year, for me and my family, has been about learning to process still seeing our Mom, but losing everything we know her to be. Weary, at times, but so Thankful for all we have learned - about our God and His Sovereign plan, about ourselves, about eachother. For that we are Thankful. And, we will wait and find Hope that someday we will know His plan in all of this.
A year ago yeasterday, as I mentioned last night, was when we had our family pictures made (they are scattered through many blog posts). Last night, after El's birthday dinner, we all went together to take Mom icecream and took some pictures together. It isn't often that we are ALL there together, so it was a special time for us - definitely reminding us we have much to be Thankful for!
I hope you all have a wonderful day with family and friends. Happy Thanksgiving from The Bain Gang (and two Grandles)! ;)
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